Friday, November 23, 2018

Big News #2!

This week we shared on social media that our family is growing! We are excited have our children close in age growing up together. I love knowing that Grayson will never remember a time not having his sibling.
I've already received several questions and have been trying to find time to type up some extra information for those of you who are curious and to help document this pregnancy (we've been so busy this fall that I've already done much less for this pregnancy than I did for Grayson's #secondchild). I had so much fun sharing my last pregnancy and documenting that I look forward to doing it again.

How far apart will the kids be?
Baby H2 is due May 2019, which will put our kids about exactly 20 months apart depending when baby decides to arrive.  Our ideal time line for kids is roughly two years apart. I grew up with a brother nine years older than me and a sister two years younger; Ben and his sister are three years apart.

How long did you try for number two?
If you remember, it took us six months to get pregnant with Grayson, so when we decided to start trying again, that was one consideration and the other factor was that Ben had a work retreat in Mexico, where Zika is still a concern. Right now the CDC recommends abstaining three months after possible exposure, which would have allowed us to start trying in January or February. Call me crazy, but I did not/do not want a child born through the holiday season; really I didn't want to be due November through February time-frame. I grew up with two best friends born on Christmas and New Years, plus I loved my fall maternity leave with Grayson, that it was important to me to think about timing.

As luck would have it, we didn't need to worry about the decision to try for a holiday baby or not because this time around things happened much quicker, as in on our first try. I think it's because I'm much more in tune with my body. In order to get pregnant the first time, I learned my ovulation signs and cycles. "Lucky me" (extreme sarcasm), even though I'm still breastfeeding Grayson now at 14 months old (it AMAZES me that my body is supporting not ONE but TWO living beings right now!), with Grayson my cycle came back around 10 weeks postpartum and has been regular ever since. Knowing we wanted to try in the fall, I started tracking my signs in the spring to get a good idea of timing.

When did you find out?
It was a few weeks before Grayson's birthday and I had recently dropped to two pumps a day at work.  I was consistently punping 8oz of milk during the day. Within days of conception, my milk supply dropped 3oz pumped and I knew I was pregnant. I waited a few days to take a test, and sure enough: positive! When I calculated the due date, I realized we were due May 10th; a day after my birthday and six days after Ben's.

Before we were officially trying, I had seen a "World's Best Brother" shirt at Target and had ordered it just in case. So I had it on hand and the Friday before Grayson's first birthday, I put it on him and let him crawl into the kitchen to tell Ben. We were both equally shocked and surprised that it happened so fast, but excited! When we initially started trying for kids in 2016, I naively thought we would have a May baby, so the fact that our second child is due in May feels like it's meant to be!

We already had Grayson's one year pictures set up, so I called my photographer to share the news. I said I know it's extremely early, but would you mind capturing a few pictures of Grayson in a big brother shirt so that we can use them to tell family? I'm so glad we added in these announcement pictures. They might be my favorite from the session. All photos in this post were taken by Courtney Heckler.
How far along are you?
Today I'm 16 weeks. Just like with Grayson, my cycle started on a Friday, so every Friday I'm one week farther along. I know it seems silly, but that makes me look forward to Fridays that much more!

It's so crazy (and honestly nerve wracking) to think that at Christmas we'll be half way there.
How are you feeling?
Thankfully with this pregnancy I haven't suffered any nausea at all. With Grayson I never got sick, or maybe once; but felt poorly enough I carried a vomit bag around with me everywhere, just in case! I was extremely tired weeks five through nine, but now that's subsided.
Are you showing?
You guys, I started wearing maternity jeans at 11 weeks; 11 weeks! With Grayson I didn't wear them until after our babymoon, so 21 weeks. I'm not majorly showing yet (although enough that I've had some people ask), but I think I knew how much more comfortable they would be than regular pants or the hair-tie trick (although I'm still doing that a little to fit into favorite jeans).

Now at 16 weeks I have more of a visible bump starting (it's so weird how bumps always come out more at night; am I right?!). I wore a button down shirt last week and realized, I don't think I can wear this buttoned more! Thank goodness last winter the majority of my tops were oversized and flowy for breastfeeding; they're perfect for this year's bump.
Are we going to find out the gender?
Nope! We have talked about it a little; but we waited for Grayson and it truly is THE BEST surprise to wait. Because we waited the first time, we have all of the initial gender neutral necessities we need anyways.

(Plus you know me, if it were a girl, I would start shopping like crazy! Even if it were a boy I probably would too because we'll need to add some summer weather newborn clothes to our closet for this baby).
Will you schedule a C-Section?
Another nope! I think I may have blogged about this before, but having Grayson via C-section was the absolute opposite birth experience I wanted when we initially found out we were pregnant and even when we found out Grayson was breech. We tried everything, everything, to change that he was breech, but in the end I still believe that he and I are in this world today because a c-section was the safest way for his arrival.

Shortly after having Grayson, I started researching VBAC supportive OBs (vaginal birth after cesarean). I came to the consensus of one highly recommended and raved about doctor in the area. As in, I've heard more than one woman say they decided to have a third child because they loved their VBAC experience and this OB so much for their second. (I also want to throw in here, in case you're a c-section mama and not familiar with where you can find information and support, International Cesarean Awareness Network is a great place to start or to heal from a previous birth experience. You can likely find local chapters to learn about VBAC supportive doctors and hospitals in your area).

Knowing we wanted to have kids close together, I met with him in the spring to ask about my likelihood of a successful VBAC and the preferred timing between pregnancies. He said I'm an ideal VBAC candidate (from what my previous OB, who specialized in breech birth, could tell, there was no reason caused by my body for Grayson to be breech). He also said he recommended 18 months between deliveries.

Also re:gender above, to be honest, there's a part of me that's scared I won't have a successful VBAC. Knowing I'll have the surprise of learning the gender at birth, regardless of how this baby arrives, makes me excited!

So we're planning on an unmedicated doula-OB supported VBAC! And delivering at a different hospital, which is also known to be extremely supportive. As one friend who has had 2 successful VBACs with my OB put it: with your experience, the OB/nurse/hospital, your doula, husband and will-power, you've got this. I hope so that comes true!
Are you going to move?
This question has come from friends and family who are familiar with our house. We have a three bedroom, two bathroom house with some "bonus" spaces like a master entry room and main floor office. We currently have our bedroom, Grayson's room, and a guest room.

With the majority of our family out of town, it is extremely convenient to have a guest room, but for how often they are here compared to our daily living, it makes more sense for us to fully utilize the room for our kids. We currently plan to the guest room into a second nursery combined with playroom (it's much bigger than Grayson's room).

Our basement isn't finished, however there is a fourth nonconventional bedroom (it has a closet and two windows) down there that we could use as a guest room if we wanted (otherwise the air matress fits in the office). We just need to find the time to update it and turn it into an actual bedroom instead of storage (i.e. we need to paint, install carpet, buy an IKEA bedframe and foam mattress in order to get down our stairs. Our current queen guest bed won't fit down the stairs because they're so steep!). This is a winter project on my goal list.

There's also the thought that if the kids are the same gender, we could have them share the large bedroom (current guest room) and then use Grayson's room as a play room and turn it into a guest room (ie pull out an air mattress when guest's come). Time will tell really! We are constantly looking at new listings online and went to see a townhouse last spring, while we have great equity in our house, the problem is that the market is so hot, we would have to spend more than we want to get what we want (a single family home with garage, grass yard, four bedrooms and two living areas). And hi, we'll have two kids in daycare, which also is not cheap here, so we're not looking to increase our mortgage right now!

How did you travel to Europe pregnant? Did you drink?
We booked our flights for a trip that's been on our beer bucketlist for years and a week later we found out we were pregnant. I figured it would happen! Thankfully, I also knew for the timing of the trip I would be in my second trimester and it would be more manageable than going those early weeks of pregnancy, and it was.

And yes, I had some beer. I was 13 weeks and had half a beer and several sips at Cantillon. I couldn't not and I've been reading up a lot on occasional drinks during pregnancy and decided I felt comfortable having some beer; and it was soooo worth it! But we also brought back plenty of beer to save until this baby arrives and I'm drinking more too.

So there you have it; the story to our growing family :)


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